The WKYT news team held their annual fantasy football draft last night and, in honor of his upcoming retirement, Rob Bromley was made league commissioner for the year. The staff quickly came to regret the decision as Bromley attempted to use his first order of business to eliminate the forward pass from this year’s competition.
Commissioner Bromley said, “I tried to give em a chance, ‘I’ll even take away the forward pass,’ I said; but Sabirah and Kristen weren’t having it, they love a good QB. So as commissioner all I got to do was pick the draft time, and add my new bobblehead to the top of the trophy.”
Bromley made waves early in the draft with the controversial selection of Johnny Unitas, “What’s a guy to do when the golden arm is still sitting there at the third pick? I’ve got this one in the bag, I haven’t been able to get Johnny U since ’56. Later in the mid-rounds I got two stellar left tackles, that’s what these young kids seem to forget, always draft a fullback early.”
“I don’t know if he knows how it works,” said Chris Bailey, who refused to draft any players that play in a dome because he feels they are “weather dodgers.” Bailey continued, “Officer Don (team name Officer First Don And Ten) really threw us all for a loop when he drafted only kickers, he might be a genius or he might be the worst player I’ve ever seen.”
“Sean Moody skyped into the draft because he had already prepaid for this year and there’s no way he was going to let those $10 go to waste,” Bailey told us. “I think my pick to win the league though is Palumbo (Head Coach of Team 3rd and Nime). I think she’s the only one that at least got a player at each position.”
“Palumbo is an idiot,” Bromley said. “Her pretty boy receivers wouldn’t stand a chance against Chuck Bednarik who I got as a steal in the third round.”
Since Bromley will be retiring soon, Victor Puente has been named League-Commissioner-In-Waiting. “I’m looking forward to my role of the league’s Dungeon Master, you see I have many years of experience in the world of games, xp if you are so incl…” we noticed he was still talking several minutes later, long after we had left the room.