Plenty Of Time After All Says 83rd District

By: Harold Leeder

January 31, 2018

Time’s Up is a movement that is currently sweeping the nation. In Hollywood and online the Time’s Up movement means time is up for sexual assault, harassment and inequality. However, in Kentucky’s 83rd district Time’s Up refers only to the deadline to run for the Kentucky General Assembly as the deadline came and went yesterday and Jeff Hoover, the state representative who was forced to resign his position as speaker of the house amidst sexual harassment charges, will run unopposed. Evidently while time is up for the rest of the country, Kentucky’s 83rd has plenty of time to continue to tolerate inappropriate behavior from their congresspeople.

“Change is good,” said farmer Elton Browne as he chopped firewood for his stove. “But it doesn’t happen overnight.” Then he placed another log on the back of his eight-year-old son Muley. It seems that no residents of the 83rd are in a hurry to enact any type of change.

“Time for change? Sure I’ll wait, what do you need change for a five?” asked former potential state representative candidate and Howie Notgonna-Eventry. Howie and his wife Imogene rock back in forth on their porch in Cumberland staring into the middle distance, the world around them silent, if not for the sound of mouths’ agape arrhythmically sucking in air, in between whispers of a forgotten nature before a car being driven by someone who clearly doesn’t live nearby passed by, “Ima, whatchu think they goin’ fishin’? Or swimming?”

“Not today Pa,” replied Imogene as she, without a single worry, enjoys life as it is; one without a conflict in need of resolution. “Bit too cold I’m afraid.” While this couple rocked back and forth on their porch waiting for the earth to rotate on its own, every other current resident of the 83rd district remained quiet yesterday, without any reason at all to get up from their bed.