Fan Assures Longtime Girlfriend He Too Will Propose When He Becomes Beloved UK Senior

By: Harold Leeder

March 2, 2017

Derek Willis’ proposal to his girlfriend was one of the more touching moments of this years’ basketball season, but it also caused a few uncomfortable looks to be exchanged between couples watching the event. After a few minutes of uncomfortable tension and stares, former college freshman Chad Goldman told his girlfriend of close to six years that “hey baby, I promise you I’ll propose on my senior night, right after I finish four hard years of basketball for UK. And the four years gotta be under Cal, you know, for us baby.”

Chad’s girlfriend, Teagan, said she’d been hoping for a proposal ever since Chad dropped out of UK before his sophomore year to pursue a career in delivering sandwiches freaky fast, but had recently started to lose hope that marriage was ever going to be an option. “When I saw that sweet moment, Derek dropping down on one knee like that, I thought, perfect, this is what Chad needs to plant the seed in his head.”

“I knew good and well what she was thinking during that proposal,” Chad said. “She was staring daggers through me. Derek Willis used to be my favorite player man, but he really hung me out to dry there.”

Since long before Tuesday night, Teagan has been supportive of Chad, but the constant replays of Ellen Calipari avoiding getting tripped by Willis, and the barrage of questions from her family about when Chad’s gonna finally pop the question has started to take it’s toll. However, she remains confident “their” day will come, “I mean I know it’s gonna happen for us, I just think the hardest part might be where Chad has to learn how to actually play basketball, and then get good enough to make the team, let alone get quality minutes.”